T - 11 Hours....

In about 11 hours I will be dropping my husband off for his deployment out at sea (sigh).  I'm not the happiest camper at the moment.  He's at the ship now dropping off the majority of his bags while I'm here with the dogs waiting for him to come home so we can spend what will be our last evening together for the next 3 (ish) months.

I could really use the support of my family and friends, this being the first deployment we've ever been through together (his 2nd). Just someone asking how I'm doing makes all the difference.  Funny, excluding the wives here, I haven't been asked that question except a couple times from my mom and a couple of my in-laws (do I let my close friends know I need them? Or should they already know?).   How am I doing?? Well....

I'm anxious.  I'm tired.  I'm a little run down.  I'm edgy.

I've never lived on my own, either. So a lot of things are new to me.  Sure, I've moved out of my parent's house but I've always had a roommate/s (older sister, 3 girls @ WVU, now Matt).  Chores and responsibilities that are normally split are now all up to me.  I had my first taste of realizing I don't know what the hell I'm doing when the internet wasn't working this morning.  Matt was at work and my dad was kind enough to Facebook chat with me on iPhone for an hour or more walking me through all the different possibilities of what could be wrong and how to fix it.  I don't know when recycling and the trash comes and I am not even sure what to do with the dumpsters. Do I leave them in their spot?  Do I bring them out to the middle of the cul-de-sac?  The simplest of things that I never thought to make a point of knowing...because Matt took care of all that stuff.  How about cutting Scuttle's nails? I had to have Matt hold on to her so she wouldn't wiggle so much!  In time, I'll get the hang of doing all these things on my own because I have to.

I know some of you may be chuckling at me : "Lauren, you don't know how to take out the trash??" "Lauren I've cut my dog's nails millions of times..it's not that hard" " I know how to hammer a entertainment system together and build my own patio/deck and garden...you've got it easy".   Yea Yea...these things are easy, and I'm not actually stressing about them...they were just the eye-opening realization of, "crap..this is all my responsibility now..how did I not even know this" lol .

I also hate being alone. I love it in the sense that I like my alone time...but I really get lonely when Matt's gone.  I go a little stir crazy when he's gone on business for just three days! I'll handle this time he is gone, because I have no other choice. But man, does it suck. 

Matt's on his way home (yay!!) so I gotta cut this short.  But, like I said before, I could use a lot of support and distraction! Please feel free to shoot me a message just shootin' the sh*t.  I have a feeling I'll be checking FB and blogs a lot.  :)  I hope everyone had a great weekend! I know I did, and I'll tell you all about when things settle down tomorrow.

XOXO